What We Lack

It was never about if, it was always just when

Shattered glass strewn across center lines

Debris from the accident 

Shattered thoughts that flood my mind from day to day

Remnants from the memories that once filled my hollow heart 

We all lack something that we hope to find in others

Like a plant seeking sunlight only to survive

It's in these desperate times that we find the will to be alive

It was in that period in which I held the thought of you so closely

Longing for the feeling of simply being wanted 

It was approximately 10pm when I arrived on scene

Your car had flipped a total of seven times

Seven years is just how long it took me 

Just to convince you I was worthy

It was last year sometime during the spring

We drove a bit up north in your dad's old car

I made you stop at a sunflower field just off the highway

Reluctantly, you followed me into the field 

I felt as though you did not want to be there with me

You looked so distant and uninterested

Have I brought you here completely against your will?

Did you realize you have no interest in me or my wants?

I took off running just to see if you would chase me

It only took about thirty seconds before you caught up to me,

You pulled me around and grabbed my wrist firmly

Your grip let loose and you slowly smiled

The paramedics said you didn’t suffer

I wonder what your last thoughts were

Did you remember the Sunflower field?

Did you remember me?

You asked me to marry you in those fields

We talked about our wedding plans the entire drive home

Police began escorting me off scene 

In disbelief I fell silent

It was so easy to plan our wedding

It turned out exactly how we wanted it

I felt like a sunflower and you were the sun

Where do I go from here

What is a flower to do without sunlight

I can't plan the life I didn’t plan to have

You were all the things I lacked